Well, the day is here. I have officially kissed my 20’s goodbye and I’m 30 now! And although I will miss portions of my youth, I believe that the next ten years have greatness in store for me. I wanted to close out the decade by sharing some little pieces of wisdom that have been shared with me and little tidbits that I’ve picked up along the road to becoming 30.

• Timelines are silly and often don’t meet your expectations- by 30 I had expected that I would start a family and be more advanced in my career. But guess what? I AM NOT READY for that next chapter and that’s okay. Don’t feel bad if you aren’t on your expected trajectory. Whatever is waiting for you is amazing.
• Relationships aren’t like what you see on social media or on television- relationships are hard, messy, and sometimes you want to throw in the towel but there are moments of joy that make it all worth it
• The more you strive to be happy, the less happy you will find yourself. – Happiness is fleeting. You will get glimpses of it. It’s not permanent. Instead of waiting for the other shoe to drop, be present in the joy.
• Don’t forget to celebrate yourself- I get so wrapped up in meeting the next milestone that I entirely skip over the part where I give myself praise for where I am. Celebrate how far you’ve come and where you are going!
• Talk to yourself the way you would a best friend- be kind to yourself. Positive self-talk is so important to the way you cultivate your confidence.
• Take breaks, don’t buy into hustle culture- burnout is so real. Don’t make yourself a victim by never making time to relax and unwind.
• Cultivate empathy- support and love each other. This has been severely lacking in this country.
• Caring about others means being politically active. – There is no room for apathy and indifference in politics when people’s fundamental rights are on the line.
• Sexuality is fluid and changing- you deserve love wherever you fall in the spectrum, even if that changes from day-to-day.
• Don’t minimize your experience or feelings just so you won’t hurt someone else- your happiness matters too. No, you shouldn’t do explicit harm if you can help it but protect your happiness even if that means you hurt feelings.
• Nurture your female friendships- having girlfriends you can vent to is almost as good as therapy
• You’re not damaged goods- I thought this about myself for as long as I can remember. Mental illness doesn’t mean you aren’t worthy of love, respect, or success
• A perfect playlist can flip any mood from bad to good
• Surround yourself with people who inspire, motivate, and elevate you

• It’s okay to recognize that some relationships have already served their purpose and it’s time to let them go Do things that you’re passionate about for no other reason than enjoyment
• Eat the cookie without guilt
• Always be honest about your feelings and your thoughts, don’t ignore your gut
• Age (in this case 30) is just a number but feeling young is a state of mind
• Cherish every moment and be present. You will find looking back that the times you complained about them hold the memories that are most dear to you
• You deserve to be treated with respect and love and you shouldn’t settle for anything less.
• Protecting your peace doesn’t make you selfish- sometimes you won’t have the emotional capacity to handle the needs of others. It is okay to make time for yourself.
• Just because someone didn’t intend to do harm doesn’t mean you didn’t get hurt and you don’t deserve an acknowledgment of those feelings
• Small mistakes will not ruin your life, don’t catastrophize or beat yourself up. Take a mistake or  a fight as a chance to learn and grow
• Foster good professional relationships- you never know who could fill the role of boss or mentor in your life. Look out for new opportunities.
• Say yes to things that scare you or make you uncomfortable.
• Write down 5 things that you are thankful for each day and remind yourself how wonderful it is to be living regardless of the external circumstances
• Don’t be too prideful to ask for help
• Try learning a new language- this has a lot of benefits: keeps your brain healthy and builds new dendrites, connects you to a culture unlike your own, helps you connect to new people
• Never let your fear of failure keep you from going after your dreams